Road less taken

On his second day home for holidays recently, Izaz came back after a ‘minum’ session with his bosom buddies (most likely at Susie’s corner, Red stall or Kadiaq) looking somewhat down. In his usual straightforward manner, he told me that his friends gave him an earful about his plan to stay on in Melbourne for another 2 years. At the moment, it would mean continuing on as a barista at 2 specialty coffee restaurants, jobs that he had taken during his final semester and that have given him his first sweet taste of financial independence. He first got his barista training and stint in KL while on a year leave from studies and has acquired a passion for the coffee business since.

   

‘When are you going to be serious?’

‘When are you going to join the corporate sector like us and start building your career?’

‘Don’t you think about marriage and having children?’

‘Don’t you think you should start networking?’

These were some of the questions lunged at him without any hint of curiosity about his work and what his actual plans were. I guess he was taken aback by their lack of interest in how he had fared in the last 18 months since they parted as, in actual fact, the period marked a significant milestone in his life. Amidst the completion of his degree studies, he had learnt to earn a living and to understand the meaning of self-empowerment. 

He could understand their point of view and the trappings that go with it. Such are the normative expectations at home immediately after one graduates…..get a regular job, a car, get married and start a family and so on. And soon enough one would be caught up in the rat race. He appreciated their concern, but I guess he wanted so much to share his recent experiences with them. The way they have shared the discoveries of their childhood and adolescent years.

It always tends to get lonely on the roads less taken. You’d have to have self-conviction and a strong resolve to meet the challenges of going against the flow. You have nothing to prove to anyone but  yourself of the worthiness of your venture. You may have clearcut objectives and ideas of what you want to achieve along, or at the end of, your journey. Perhaps you’d leave it to serendipity to lead you to new shores, greater heights. A corporate job would be more stable, more predictable. 

I was recently drawn to a recent article in the newspaper in which the writer pointed out the importance of knowing which doors are open and closed to you, and when, and which doors will never be open for you due to lack of talent, money or social capital. And that one should walk away from closed doors and move on. If passion had led Izaz into that open door on which he knocked many times to enter, now he knows that the blood, sweat and tears from that passion are making him stay inside. For he is immersed in everything behind the coffee culture – the beans, the recipe, the business, the work ethics, service quality, customer relations. And he has spoken to me about the career progression and options in the profession. Customers decide your rise and fall, so you are on your toes all the time. A corporate job would be more comfortable, more accommodating.

There was a time when Izaz was too shy to even give his orders to the waiter and he’d get nervous each time one of us would be up on stage singing or something. He’d grown out of that, of course, but is generally more introverted than otherwise though he can be a good conversationalist when he doesn’t mind talking instead of just listening. What he says, and how he says it, can make me burst out laughing sporadically. Working as a barista, he seems to enjoy seeing his customers return and getting to know them. As he told cousin Izi who was contemplating on taking a waitressing job…’Go for it, it will improve your communication skills.’ Companies pay a lot for staff training on communication skills in the corporate sector. The courses run from a day to two usually.

As long as you don’t dread that 20-minute train ride in the cold morning, anxious to be at work on time, do not feel the muscle strain in your arms while churning out the orders and appreciate the workout you get from carrying the hefty coffee bean bags, you know the adrenaline’s flowing. Just as I knew you’d never lose the gumption for computers when I saw you once, at 14, lying face down sideways with tears streaming to the floor in frustration over not being able to grasp C++ programming on your own. I had bought all the books you wanted and sent you to courses what-have-you. You would complete a story book in a single night just so you could get the latest issue of ‘electronic games monthly’ (our deal). You were fascinated by William, my office IT administrator, and wanted to know his profile, what kind of problems I would go to him for and how he would answer me, even his favourite colour, etc, etc! Gosh, you were hilarious…we had a good laugh in the office over that. Talk about passion…you had ground that out too. So I know the IT degree will find its place in your life someday. You’ll know when to enter that open door. Perhaps now you need a break from it all. As long as the happiness in those cuppas you serve bounces back to you, stay. And whatever career you eventually choose, I pray that it would indeed be your vocation too so the commitment would be total.  

So take only the positive side of what the critics have to say and rebut when you are not in your laid-back mood. A debate can be healthy. Staying mum is ok too…..’silence is golden’, says the wise one. The important thing is to live our moments consciously. Meanwhile I look forward to sms on your little coffee shop anecdotes. My favourite is about the Italian guy who drank your espresso silently and left a twenty dollar bill for you. Yeah, silence is golden….more often than not.